


Recurring

by hongmunmu



Series: Life, Death, Time, Earth [8]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Stream of Consciousness, just mentions of the other characters lol, orochimaru-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-10
Updated: 2014-03-10
Packaged: 2018-01-15 07:39:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1296820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hongmunmu/pseuds/hongmunmu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A brief reflection on circles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Recurring

Ｗhen faced the question of  _which would you rather endure_ : extreme **heat**  or extreme  **cold—**  many choose to opt with the latter. But in actuality, extreme cold can be just as much agony. Numbing sense, head feeling like a dead weight. Slowly it rattles through your bones and ̅h̅̅o̅̅l̅̅l̅̅o̅̅w̅̅s̅ them out from the inside. Your extremities freeze; you become ˢᵐᵃˡˡᵉʳ.  **Whittling away** to a ʜᴇᴀᴅ and a  **heart**. This is torture equal to that of burning alive.

Many say that when they touch something extremely cold, it feels as though it is ‘ _burning_ ’. By this logic, the extremes of hot and cold are not a scale but a cιrcυlαr ѕpecтrυм. Cyclical structure. One blends into the other. Round and around.

This makes more sense when you use comparisons. Day and night are opposites however if you have ever onlooked a sunrise or a sunset you will see that the world flickers from one to the next in minutes. They are not polar opposites;  _ **they’re next to eachother.**_  Though some may not see it that way.

T̲̲h̲̲i̲̲s̲̲ ̲̲i̲̲s̲̲ ̲̲a̲̲l̲̲l̲̲ ̲̲j̲̲u̲̲s̲̲t̲̲ ̲̲m̲̲y̲̲ ̲̲h̲̲u̲̲m̲̲b̲̲l̲̲e̲̲ ̲̲o̲̲p̲̲i̲̲n̲̲i̲̲o̲̲n̲̲,̲̲ ̲̲o̲̲f̲̲ ̲̲c̲̲o̲̲u̲̲r̲̲s̲̲e̲̲.̲ ~~  
~~

This extends into other forms of opposites. A popular, despite somewhat  **morbid,** _'which would you rather'_  question is the choice of ᴰᴿᴼᵂᴺᴵᴺᴳ  or ᴮᵁᴿᴺᴵᴺᴳ ᴬᴸᴵᵛᴱ. In many cases people struggle to choose **;**  nobody wants to die in either way, generally.

Ｏnce a man told me he’d go down in fire or water but never by a blade. Said he wanted to die by the hand of God, not by man and steel. He shared my stance on a cyclical opposition. “ _What’s the difference,_ " he had said, " _between stepping in fire and stepping in boiling water? **Not a damn thing.**_ ”

Not a damn thing, indeed.

But I have experienced both. I would not describe either as a channel of God’s will.

Indeed, I kept tabs on the man. He died in the war a few years later. A katana through his heart.

A God’s grace, if you ask me. They do say God is merciful.

Sarutobi laughed when I told that story. I asked him why. He told me that I was night, Jiraiya was day, and Tsunade was the flickering and doubting sunrise and sunset lingering somewhere in between. Similarly, we were the drowned, the burned and the stabbed in that man’s little scenario.

Incidentally, I despised night. I still do. Jiraiya loved it, as far as I knew.

Ice and fire are merely two sides of the same coin. But if it was a choice given to me I would return that copper to the backhand gambling parlour from whence it came.

Burning is pure pain.  _Agony_. Flames do not flinch at screams. If your arms are immobile you cannot fight back against something that is not physical. There’s no way out. Flesh burns away layer by layer. Through muscle and bone. Fat melts like tallow wax. You see your own body lose form. **You**  lose form.

Drowning is slow.  _A weight._  Crushing, it stops you thinking. You can’t go anywhere; all around you is the dim, the cold and damp. You’re immersed, lost forever. There’s no way out. Only impending darkness creeping around your vision. You try to scream but you can’t.  _You go mad in the last few seconds you are alive._  You feel your mind lose form.  **You**  lose form.

In the end, they’re the same thing.

But like I said, I’ve experienced everything on the spectrum. If I were the child playing the choices game, I would utter not a word but walk away─

─ɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴘɪᴄᴋ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛᴇᴇʟ ᴀɴʏ ᴅᴀ **ʏ.**


End file.
